Totally Unspiritual Post of the Week, #7

For this week's totally unspiritual post, I have two things:

1) RPS 15

Rock paper scissors was invented by framers of the constitution to decide crucial issues of civil liberties once and for all - which is where the ACLU picked up the trend of using it in court. We all know that rock smashes scissors, paper covers rock, and scissors impale the unsuspecting loser, but modern diplomacy and global negotiations theory has necessitated the invention of a new alternative: RPS 15. Moving beyond the limitations of the original Rock-Paper-Scissors, RPS 15 can be used to decide more complex issues such as nuclear arms escalation, modern game theory, global poverty, and whether or not people without arms should be allowed careers in diplomacy.

The relationships of winning and losing can be tracked using the chart below.



2) Additionally, I found this article to be a comforting reality should RPS 15 diplomacy break down, thus throwing the US into a foreign conflict. The next time terrorists or other enemies try to swim into the country for an invasion, we'll be ready for 'em.

Armed and dangerous - Flipper the firing dolphin let loose by Katrina by Mark Townsend Houston, Sunday September 25, 2005
The Observer

It may be the oddest tale to emerge from the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. Armed dolphins, trained by the US military to shoot terrorists and pinpoint spies underwater, may be missing in the Gulf of Mexico.

Experts who have studied the US navy's cetacean training exercises claim the 36 mammals could be carrying 'toxic dart' guns. Divers and surfers risk attack, they claim, from a species considered to be among the planet's smartest. The US navy admits it has been training dolphins for military purposes, but has refused to confirm that any are missing.

Dolphins have been trained in attack-and-kill missions since the Cold War. The US Atlantic bottlenose dolphins have apparently been taught to shoot terrorists attacking military vessels. Their coastal compound was breached during the storm, sweeping them out to sea. But those who have studied the controversial use of dolphins in the US defence programme claim it is vital they are caught quickly.

Leo Sheridan, 72, a respected accident investigator who has worked for government and industry, said he had received intelligence from sources close to the US government's marine fisheries service confirming dolphins had escaped.

'My concern is that they have learnt to shoot at divers in wetsuits who have simulated terrorists in exercises. If divers or windsurfers are mistaken for a spy or suicide bomber and if equipped with special harnesses carrying toxic darts, they could fire,' he said. 'The darts are designed to put the target to sleep so they can be interrogated later, but what happens if the victim is not found for hours?'...