Top Ten Ways to Reach Ruined For Life

Anyone that has a website with a decent stats program can see all of the nifty search terms that get people to their site from Google, Yahoo, and all the other engines. These search engines all function in a slightly different way, but most all of them have "robots" that constantly crawl around in the internet all day long, combing over websites for updates, carrying out assassination plots, and slowly plotting their takeover of the human race. These robots then report their findings to King Google or Queen Yahoo, and are promptly sent off again to keep looking into our business.

You'll be pleased to know, however, that these robots aren't as smart as you would think, and they're probably at least 6 months away from being able to pull off a governmental overthrow. The kinds of phrases they pick up from a site are often pulled from many different words scattered throughout a site. I get a laugh seeing not only the search terms that bring people to RFL, but the kinds of things people actually type into Google or Yahoo. Thus, I present you with: the top 10 search phrases that brought somebody to Ruined For Life. These are not altered or made up. Someone actually typed these in, and somewhere in the thousands of search results that popped up, got to my site from those search results. I sure hope they found what they were looking for... except for #9-#1. Here they are:

#10: "Where is Pacific Coast Academy Located From Zoey 101 If I Want To Join"
#9: "How Cocaine Ruined My Life"
#8: "Was serial killer ted bundy ever excommunicated from the mormon curch?"
#7: "Ruined Orgasm"
#6: "Braless blunder pictures"
#5: "Erotic Dream of Coworker"
#4: "Sex Proned Secret Society"
#3: "Husbands fart"
#2: "Is Anal Sex Unspiritual"
#1: "Truckers Hygene Video"

As a note, I would have switched #1 and #2, but frankly, it's easier (and a little less controversial) to photoshop a picture for #1. This post is meant to demonstrate that even with the best of intentions a pure, chaste, and godly site such as Ruined For Life can be accused of containing content about sex-proned secret societies of unhygienic truckers that snort cocaine and participate in possible "unspiritual" activities involving their nether-regions. Be forewarned... you never know what you’ll find here. Hopefully though, someone will someday search for something truly sick and twisted, like “Jesus” or “Chris Van Velzer,” and they’ll end up here. (Google my name: RFL doesn’t even turn up until the 3rd or 4th page!). Oh well – you’re welcome to stay, however you got here. Probably.